


Music and Memories

by bearhoon



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff and Angst, Idol Hoshi, M/M, Producer Lee Jihoon | Woozi, Soonhoon - Freeform, soonhoon screams angst idk why
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-04
Updated: 2019-03-02
Packaged: 2019-09-07 04:13:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16846900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bearhoon/pseuds/bearhoon
Summary: Lee Jihoon aka Woozi is a faceless popular music producer, tasked to produce a song for the debut of a solo singer, Hoshi. Little did he know it's going to open the wounds that have already closed years ago.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> More charas will be added once the story progress~
> 
> Unbeta-ed. Orz.

It was just one of Lee Jihoon’s boring days, sitting on his couch as he flips through the tv channels. It was his request to have a week vacation. Vacation means, staying at his cozy apartment all day, free of stress. His friend Seokmin plopped himself beside him and took the remote from Jihoon, inputting SBC Channel. When the entertainment headline appeared, Jihoon can only roll his eyes while Seokmin gave him the _grin._

 

_“Producer and songwriter Woozi is once again the talk of the country when music awards shows released their set of nominees for Daesang and 80% of the songs nominated was made by him. As you all may know, Woozi is the faceless producer of Pleid Ent. who made his debut 2 years ago through the popular singer, DK, whose song Downpour is still unbeatable as the highest streamed song for a solo singer. Usually the artist or the group whom he chooses to sing his songs were able to grab at least one Daesang in award shows. We have interviewed a few of the artists Woozi produced songs with:_

 

 _“_ **_We haven’t really saw Woozi-nim’s face. We just enter the recording room and see a heavily tinted glass and he just speaks through the speakers.”_ **

 

**_“His voice was quite small i think. But he has this stern voice that makes you want to listen and obey his teachings.”_ **

 

**_“He’s really patient and he once encouraged me when I thought I won’t be able to sing the song properly. His songs were always so beautiful and meaningful. It was a pleasure and a big opportunity for having one of my songs--”_ **

 

The interview was cut off and the tv was turned off after Jihoon finally stole the remote from Seokmin.

 

“Hey! Why did you do that. I was watching it.” Seokmin whine while pouting and Jihoon scrunches his face up in disgust. It was not cute at all.

 

“I don’t want to see your face being interviewed and to hear what you’re going to say.” He deadpans, while settling the channel to Animal Planet.

 

“But being the only artist to know who Woozi really is, is a privilege, hyung. And I’m so- so lucky to have such a wonderful and cute and--” Jihoon stuffed Seokmin’s mouth with the popcorn the younger had on his lap.

 

“Stop with the cheese. And I told you not to call me cute.” Jihoon snapped but Seokmin just laughed it off while munching the popcorn instead.

 

Jihoon is actually the one thankful to Seokmin. If not because of him, maybe, Jihoon won’t be where he is today. 

 

* * *

 

2 years ago, Seokmin went to his apartment (he barged in) startling the older while he was eating his breakfast. “Write a song for me.” Seokmin says so serious he made Jihoon laugh since the Seokmin he knows doesn’t know what serious means..

 

“Your company will not let someone like me to make your songs, Seokmin.” Jihoon continued eating his breakfast, hearing the chair beside him being pulled.

 

“But hyung, I want to sing your song. I’ve heard thousand’s of them--”

 

“You’re exaggerating.”

 

“And everything is beautiful no matter what genre it is.”

 

“I really shouldn’t have let you hear them.”

 

“Please hyung, pretty please. I already told my company that I know someone who makes great music. I bet on it so you have to do it for me.” Seokmin, gave him this puppy-eye look and Jihoon sighed, placing his chopsticks on his plate.

 

“Look, Seokmin.” He turned to the younger, a sad smile on his face. “You know I stopped writing songs after high school. It’s been what? 2 years since then? I just can’t do it--”

 

“You won’t do it because it reminds you of _him_.” Seokmin interjected, a frown forming on his forehead and now he’s the one sighing. “Like what you said hyung, it’s been two years already. For two years, you suffered. It’s still as if your world only revolves around him, controlling you even though he’s not here anymore. Jisoo hyung said how you were always having fun writing songs and I know it's for him- But you also wrote a song for your parents and for Jisoo hyung-- you told me you'll delete your songs and move on when you made me listen to it. Did you even do it? And don’t even deny it when i say you still write because i saw your scribbled songs thrown on your trash can.”

 

There was silence between after Seokmin spoke, more like snapped and Jihoon knows the latter is right. He heard the screeching of the chair again, and Seokmin stood up from his seat. “You need to move forward, hyung. Don’t let the past stop you from doing what you love.”

 

And then Seokmin was gone.

 

A lone tear escaped from Jihoon’s eyes and he couldn't stop it. He constantly wrote songs whenever he thinks of something but stops in the middle of it once he remembered the reason why he stopped writing. He was looking for the compliment he wouldn’t get anymore since _he’s_ gone already.

 

Jihoon shook his head, chuckling because as much as he doesn't want to say it, Seokmin was right. He should be done moping about _him_ and move on already. Waiting for someone who haven’t showed up for four years feels like a loser. He wiped his tears away and continued eating while tapping on his phone. One ring and the call got answered.

 

“Come here tomorrow at 9 and don’t be late.”

 

* * *

 

 

“Jihoon, we have a new project.” The first thing their CEO told him right after his vacation. He loves (not in a romantic way) their CEO, Choi Seungcheol, but hates him at the same time. He looks at Jihoon like he’s some sort of a toddler and coos at him every time Jihoon is frowning. _You’re too cute_ , he says. Then Jihoon can only roll his eyes and pretends not to hear him.

 

One thing Jihoon was glad though was when Seungcheol agreed for Jihoon to hide his identity and be called “Woozi”. After seeing Seokmin being chased by paparazzis and antis spreading false rumours, Jihoon would rather stay hidden and live a normal life. After listening to Jihoon’s song, Seungcheol asked him to work for him and immediately gave Jihoon a recording studio of his own where the glass which separates him and the artist is tinted.

 

“Carat Ent. is going to debut a solo artist and they want you to produce for their song.” Seungcheol has this smile on his face that Jihoon couldn’t decipher. “After having a long talk with their CEO, I’ve decided to agree with their offer.”

 

“Okay?” Woozi sounded doubtful. There’s something their CEO is not telling him. He shrugs it off anyways. “He or she? What’s their name?”

 

“His name is _Hoshi_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! So this has been in my draft for too long already so i decided to put it up here in hopes that i'll have the motivation to finish this because i have everything in mind already but my fingers won't do their work orz. I put it in my twi but i got so busy i didn't get to continue writing. 
> 
> please do hit me up @igotminghaoed in twi~ i'm still looking for carats to be friends with since i'm just like 2month old ;w; 
> 
> Comments are highly appreciated~


	2. Chapter 1: The First Meeting

“Seokmin, have you heard about Carat’s new idol, Hoshi?” Jihoon asked the younger while they’re having their dinner later that night. Seokmin barged in, in Jihoon’s flat carrying boxes of take outs with him. 

 

“Uh, yeah. It was quite a gossip lately amongst us. Carat’s been silent about debuting a new group or artist. They were stable enough with their current group’s success for the past 3 years anyways.” Seokmin took a mouthful of food before continuing but Jihoon stopped him while saying he should swallow the food first. Seokmin grinned and replied a  _ How did you know I swallow?  _ It cause for Jihoon to almost choke on his drink while muttering a  _ What the fuck Lee Seokmin _ but it got lost in the background because of Seokmin’s loud and crazy laugh. 

 

When Seokmin finally stopped laughing (thankfully) he continued to tell Jihoon what he knew about the new idol Carat Entertainment is going to debut. Jihoon learned that  _ Hoshi _ had been training for four years alread and is Carat Entertainment’s hidden gem. Now, Jihoon’s job is to make sure that Hoshi will have an amazing debut. 

* * *

 

 

The day Jihoon is going to meet Hoshi finally arrived.  Everything is going well but Jihoon felt uneasy somehow and he doesn’t know why. He already called Seokmin to ask for some advice. His heart beats rapidly for unknown reason to the point that he thinks he’s sick but Seokmin assured him that it must have been due to pressure, anxiety, or excitement since it’s the first time Jihoon will make a debut song. It took a lot of convincing from Seokmin’s part until he was able to make Jihoon hang the phone up. 

 

Jihoon’s hands are getting clammy as the seconds tick. Three more minutes until he’s able to meet Hoshi. And yes, it’s definitely—most probably because it’s his first time making a debut song. It does feel like Hoshi’s success depends on the song he’s going to make for him but of course, if Hoshi will deliver it well. 

 

There are three doors in the recording studio: one for the recording area, one for the control booth and the last one is the door separating the recording area and control booth. The door in the recording area opened and Jihoon looked up from his seat to see a beautiful, lean man entering the room, looking lost. It has crossed Jihoon’s mind that the man is probably Hoshii since the young man’s features can really pass as an idol. Jihoon turned the mic on and he greeted his visitor. “Good morning.”

 

“Oh hi!” The young man finally looked at the glass and Jihoon saw how he flinched in surprise before that. He waved though he couldn’t see Jihoon. “Wow. So it is real when they said no one can see you from there.” 

 

“Are you?” Jihoon trailed off and the latter shakes his head off knowing what Jihoon had meant. 

 

“No, no. I’m Yoon Jeonghan. Carat’s CEO.” Jihoon almost fell on his seat after hearing what the young man had said. Jihoon had always thought that Carat’s CEO is a  **_GIRL._ ** H

The first time he saw Carat’s CEO when Jihoon was on his way to Seungcheol’s office. Seokmin pulled him to the side and gossiped that the person who’s talking to Seungcheol as of the moment is the CEO of Carat Entertainment. Jihoon can only see the CEO’s upperbody and the person has a medium length hair. He caught a glimpse of the person’s side profile and he was convinced that the CEO was a girl. Turned out, the she is actually a he. But the CEO right in front of Jihoon doesn’t have that pretty straight hair. 

 

Jihoon apologized saying he didn’t know at all and Jeonghan only laughed at him. “It’s alright, young lad. Only a few knows my face.”

 

“You got the face to be an idol—and you look so young to be a CEO.” 

 

“Thank you for the compliment Producer Woozi. Isn’t your CEO also young?”

 

“Nah. Seungcheol-hyung is an old man.” And that earn a laugh from Jeonghan as if understanding Jihoon’s insjde joke.  Jihoon laughed along with him but got interrupted when the door opened, hearing a soft good morning.

 

When the new guy entered, Jihoon felt the world around him slowing down until it stopped. His hands sweat, his eyes widened in surprise, his heart is beating too fast for his liking, and he almost forgot to breathe. He couldn’t hear a thing even when the two people on the other side are obviously speaking. The only thing he can hear is the beating of his heart and the voice in his head that has been haunting him for years even when he tried really hard to forget. He doesn’t know what hurts more. His nails digging on his palm or his heart that felt like it got stepped on by a 10-wheeler truck. He got out of his trance when Jeonghan kept on calling his name with a worried expression.

 

“Uh—uh… yes?” He stuttered, finally finding himself breathing.

 

“Woozi, are you okay?” Jeonghan asks, taking his phone out from his front pocket. “Are you not feeling well? Should I call your CEO?” 

 

“No, no. I’m alright.” Jihoon replied, clearing his throat, his eyes still trained on the newcomer. Jeonghan still has that worried look on his face but he put back his phone on his pocket. “And you are?” 

 

The new guy, a bit shorter than Jeonghan with small, soft yet sharp eyes, button nose and thin lips. When the guy final spoke, Jihoon clenched his hands fighting back the tears that are threatening to spill. “Hi! I’m Hoshi! Please take—”

 

“Excuse me for a while.” Jihoon interrupted Hoshi’s  greeting, turning off his mic so that they couldn’t hear him. His hands began to tremble, because it’s  _ him _ . It’s definitely  _ him. _ He didn’t even realize he was already crying not until he felt wet drops flowing on his cheeks.

 

“Is he okay?” He heard Hoshi’s voice through the speakers. Jihoon turned their mic off not wanting to hear their voices anymore. He saw  _ Hoshi _ looking towards him worry painting his face. Even through the glass separating them is a two-way mirror, Jihoon doesn’t know how  _ Hoshi _ managed to lock eyes with him. With trembling hands, he managed to get his phone and dials Seungcheol’s number in an instant. 

 

“Get them out of here.” Jihoon whispered on his phone almost helpless. 

 

_ “Jihoon. What’s the matter?” _

 

“Please, Cheol-hyung. Get them out of here. Please.” He pleaded, trying his best not to be obvious that he’s crying his heart out while looking at the person he never thought that he will meet again.  Jihoon doesn’t know if Seungcheol caught up to it but if he ever did, he didn’t say it.

 

_ “Alright. But I’m going to send Seokmin over there.” _

 

With that, Seungcheol hanged-up the phone. Right after their phone call, Jeonghan picked up his phone, putting it on his ear and nods at whatever he is saying. Jihoon flinched when  _ Hoshi _ looked at him again as if there is a magnetic force between them that makes the latter know where Jihoon is since he was able to catch his eyes once again. 

 

Jeonghan said something to Hoshi and the younger one nodded in understanding. Jihoon has no idea what Seungcheol said to Jeonghan but whatever that is, it made the latter give a thumbs up to Jihoon then bowing his head down before leaving.  Jeonghan stepped out of the Recording room first but Hoshi stayed there his eyes still looking at the mirror right in front of him. Jihoon doesn’t know whether he was looking at himself or he was trying to discern what is happening in the other side of the room. With a heavy sigh, Hoshi finally stepped out of the room and closing the door not before he can sneak in a hand and wave a goodbye. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! 
> 
> I'm sorry for the very very very late update. I was busy preparing for our Christmas Party and was also busy with work. X3
> 
> This was actually written weeks ago but as days pass by new ideas comes. My plot suddenly changed orz
> 
> Anyways, HAPPY NEW YEAR. 
> 
> Last December, we did not just get the Best OST in MAMA but also Best Male Performance Group ㅠㅠ  
> we were also given a new song from Seventeen, "Getting Closer"! And SVT performed a lot and we were spoiled by their amazing performances. <3 they were so handsome im their year-end shows. Sobs
> 
>  
> 
> Let's keep on supporting Seventeen this 2019 too!
> 
> Hmu @igotminghaoed


	3. Chapter 2: The Key

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In Soonyoung's POV

****

Dejected. That’s what Soonyoung felt when he stepped out of the studio after Jeonghan was told that Woozi is not feeling well. The frown on Jeonghan’s face while he was on the phone tells that something was off. He wants to ask Jeonghan about it. Did Woozi not like him? Is there something wrong with him? But he barely introduced himself when Woozi excused himself for reasons Soonyoung didn’t know. 

He must be thinking too much because Jeonghan suddenly cupped his face and eased the frown away on his forehead. “Whatever you are thinking, it’s not that, okay?” Jeonghan smiled softly at him, and gives him a pat on his head. “Maybe Woozi is really not feeling well. I heard from Seungcheol he tends to overwork himself after all.”

Jeonghan’s phone rings, excusing himself to answer it. Soonyoung is really thankful Jeonghan is with him. He’s not just a mere CEO of Carat Ent. Jeonghan is his cousin. But despite the biggest connection out of all trainees, Soonyoung didn’t use that advantage to have a debut; Jeonghan told him the same thing when he started his training. 

****  
  


That time, the company was held by his uncle, Jeonghan’s father. His uncle also honed Jeonghan to be a proper CEO of their entertainment company. He was given glances and side-eyes, fake smiles, fake friendships, they spread gossips when people from their company knew he’s closely related to the CEO. But Soonyoung proved to them he deserved to be where he is now. He gave all his best, his hard work, training diligently for years, and then met friends along the way. He was able to show his funny and bright side to the people who judged him just because he’s their CEO’s nephew. 

A few years later, his uncle died due to an illness and Jeonghan took over the company. He barely had time with Soonyoung not like before but Soonyoung understood. Jeonghan sometimes visits him during his breaks. One day, Jeonghan came to him during his vocal training then he announced his debut. He was surprised, happy, ecstatic, but his head was suddenly swarmed with thoughts of people judging him because of his connections. It was a solo debut after all. He looked back to his friends whom he trained with for four years. He wanted to debut with them after all. They already talked about the things they’re going to do once they debut and then it was announced he’s going solo. But instead of judging look, sad faces, he was met with warm hugs and genuine congratulations from them. Then Jeonghan stated the board’s plan. 

It’s been years since they debuted a group and they’ll going one step at a time. Someone will debut as a solo to be known in the industry and then, in some of the tracks, the rappers will be given exposure in the songs. In the music video, everyone in the team will be the backup dancers but the performance team will have more exposures and the vocals will be the background vocals in each song. 

Their mentors during training suggested Soonyoung as the one who is pretty capable on going solo and everyone agreed. Even his friends says so. 

Seungkwan once expressed how talented Soonyoung is. He can sing, he can rap, and he kills in dancing. He’s a total performer. He was praised a lot by their mentors but Soonyoung never forgot to look back to where he started and stayed humble. He also helps his team on the things they’re having a hard time with especially in dancing which is his forte. 

“When we debut, I’ll give all my votes to Soonyoung-hyung to be our leader.” Mingyu, one of the rappers expressed his thought and it was a motivation to do his very best on debuting successfully. 

He’s not doing this for himself. He’s doing this for his friends that he left behind. He must have a successful debut, receive recognitions and get South Korea’s heart and the heart of the International fans. It’s a lot of stress and pressure but for his team, Soonyoung will do everything. 

So when Jeonghan told him Woozi is his debut album producer, Soonyoung dropped his knees to the ground in surprise and disbelief. Woozi is a songwriter-producer known for his beautiful and top ranking songs. Soonyoung didn’t know how did Jeonghan convince the Pleid CEO to have Woozi as his producer but everything is surreal. Woozi is not just a mere producer for Soonyoung. He is a mystery.

When the singer DK released his song “Downpour”, something unexplainable happened to Soonyoung. His heart started to beat fast, his head hurts a lot and he couldn’t help himself but to cry. The melody of the song felt so nostalgic he tried to dig up from his useless brain for memories of familiarity but to no avail he couldn’t remember where he have heard it. On that day, his mind went blank and he fainted. Luckily, Jeonghan found him in his room a few minutes later and he was sent to the hospital immediately. 

His doctor told him he fainted due to over-exhaustion and he only needed to get more rest. He stayed in the hospital overnight with his thoughts lingering on the melody of Downpour and the producer behind it, Woozi. 

Since then, Soonyoung became a fan. There is a certain attachment on Woozi’s works that he couldn’t explain. Woozi is known as the faceless producer but somehow, somewhere in his heart and mind, he feels like he have known him for a long time already.

 

* * *

Jeonghan told Soonyoung that he is being called by Seungcheol, Pleid’s CEO, and he asked the younger if he wants to come. Soonyoung shook his head instead and replied, “I’ll just-- walk around here for a while or something.” Jeonghan gave him another pat on his head before proceeding to meet Seungcheol.

Soonyoung didn’t know where to go. He’s still standing there in place until he decided to just grab something to eat from the company’s cafeteria. He stared at the door with a  _ No Entry  _ sign which leads to the control room where Woozi is. Upon realization that Woozi is unwell, he was about to take a step towards the door but someone beat him up to it. He squinted his eyes and realized that it was DK. At that moment, DK turned his head towards him and Soonyoung spun around his heels and slowly walked away.  _ Slowly. _

Soonyoung was only a few steps away when he heard a knock on the door and a soft, “Jihoon-hyung, it’s me. Open the door.” 

As if he has no control over his body, Soonyoung halted his steps. He stood there, heart pounding with reasons he don’t understand. 

The door creaked open and it takes a lot of Soonyoung’s nerves to not look back and see the face behind Woozi. “Seokmin-ah.” It was the same voice he had heard earlier but now, it sounds so weak, vulnerable, defeated. Another wave of nostalgia hit him. It first happened when he heard Woozi’s voice through the speakers and it was hard composing himself when his head started to throb and his hands started to become sweaty. 

He heard the door closing and he lets go of the breath he didn’t know he was holding. He had been trying to solve the mystery that is  _ Woozi  _ ever since he first heard Downpour. Since that day happened when he fainted and was brought to the hospital, he dreamed of a faceless man with no voice. Sometimes he wakes up happy, sometimes he wakes up sad and sometimes, he wakes up crying. He didn’t tell any of those on Jeonghan. Soonyoung doesn’t want to bother his cousin about his personal problems after all. 

Soonyoung moved his feet and walks to where his cousin is with his mind lingering on Woozi. He was happy knowing that a famous producer will make his songs but there’s another reason why he was excited to be under Woozi’s wing.

****  
  
  
  
  


Woozi might be the key to the past that he had been trying to find since four years ago. 

****  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!!!
> 
> I posted in my twi that I'd be updating tomorrow but I had the urge to write down this chapter last night so i was able to finish it today. 
> 
> And now i gave you a hint at what actually happened to Soonyoung. :3 
> 
> Idk how entertainment industry works and if it's possible to be a trainee while your cousin is a CEO but it works between Jeonghan and Soonyoung 😂
> 
> I think i failed with the timeline of events in this chapter but i hope you do understand what Soonyoung wanted to convey.
> 
> Kudos and comments are highly appreciated <3
> 
> Stream [ GETTING CLOSER ](https://youtu.be/cr_lx0GSfrA) under SVT channel!
> 
> You can hmu at [@igotminghaoed](https://www.twitter.com/igotminghaoed) you can talk to me there :3


	4. Chapter 2.5 Extra: The Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Extra Chapter:
> 
> The story of how Seokmin and Jihoon met and who is Soonyoung in Jihoon's life (I know you know that already).

Seokmin and Jihoon knew each other through Hong Jisoo, Jihoon’s cousin and Seokmin’s childhood friend. Seokmin was a freshman majoring in Performing Arts, minor in Songwriter while Jihoon is a second year majoring in Business Management minor in “trying-avoid-music” and Jisoo is a student intern in the Medical Department; the three of them are going in the same university.

 

Jihoon and Jisoo were already sharing an apartment when Seokmin joined them. “It’s just temporary,” Jisoo told Jihoon days before Seokmin arrived. “He told me it’s just for a year since our location is also the closest to where his company is. Imagine him going into extensive training for him to debut while studying.”

 

Jihoon and Seokmin barely said hello to each other since Jihoon goes out early while Seokmin comes home late. The only day they got the chance to talk properly was when Jihoon went home to a Seokmin trying to find the right note to his song.

 

“Maybe you should try using _mi_ instead of _fa_.” Jihoon blurted out, unable to control himself from helping the younger one who has been scratching his head for ten times in a span of one minute.

 

Seokmin on the other hand jolted in surprise he accidentally slammed his hand on his keyboard and Jihoon winced at the mixed sound of the piano keys. Seokmin nods and followed Jihoon’s advice and truth to be told, it sounded better than what he expected to be. He murmured a soft thank you and Jihoon nods in acknowledgement then proceeded to walk to his room.

 

Thirty minutes later, Jihoon went out of his room to get some snacks when he saw Seokmin still having a crisis towards his song.  Jihoon, despite of trying to be cold and distant towards anything related to music composition still have a 1% of goodness in him. He took a bag of chips from the fridge then goes to Seokmin in the living room and sat beside him.

 

“I’m going to help you with this but only this time.” Jihoon said and he didn’t notice Jisoo peeking in between his bedroom door with a smile on his face. Seokmin did though.

 

Seokmin had heard a lot of things about Jihoon. Jisoo had shared stories about his musical genius cousin and every time Jisoo comes back to Seoul from a vacation at Jihoon’s hometown, he let Seokmin hear Jihoon’s composition. They were lyric-less songs but they still sound beautiful. It was during those moments when Seokmin asked his parents if he can study on playing the piano and thankfully, he let them.

 

But Seokmin had always wanted to be an idol and he started training when he was fifteen. Then when he remembered about Jihoon’s compositions, that’s what urged him to try and take up a minor in songwriting when he goes to college so that when he finally debut, he can also write his own songs.

 

Before he arrived at Jisoo’s apartment, he was already warned by Jisoo not to mention anything about his previous works. He then learned that Jihoon had stopped writing since a year ago. Jisoo wouldn’t tell him the reason why and it’s not Seokmin’s business not to pry. But Seokmin thought that it was such a pity since Jihoon is very much gifted when it comes to music.

 

It was November 22nd when Seokmin was given answers to his questions. He arrived home to an already drunk Jihoon with a can of beer on hand and a Jisoo sitting across Jihoon while reading a book and an unfamiliar song being played in the background. It must have been visible of how confused he was because Jisoo told him to just let Jihoon be. Jihoon’s eyes were red and swollen, an obvious sign that he cried too much. Jisoo then signaled Seokmin to go inside their room.

 

“I know you know how great Jihoon’s music is. I’m sure you were wondering as to what actually happened why Jihoon suddenly stopped writing. You look up to him after all.” Jisoo started once they were settled on each other’s bed. “Jihoon had a lover before. They’ve been together for four years. He was the reason why he started to write and compose songs. Jihoon learned how to play the piano at the age of seven. He had been experimenting with the keys since then. He always excitedly let me listen to the melodies he made every time I visit their place during breaks. His piano teacher even said that Jihoon is a prodigy since at his young age he can already compose.

 

“His lover though, he wrote poems to Jihoon and he always told me how beautiful they were. Every time Jihoon receives a poem from him, they gave him ideas on how to convey his feelings to his lover since he is not that expressive. So he started to write lyrics and make it into a song accompanied by his piano and gave it to his lover on his birthdays, on their anniversaries, their 100th day, 500th day— But then, on his lover’s birthday two years ago, him and his family went on a vacation.” Jisoo released a sigh and a sad smile formed on his face.

 

“Then he never came back.”

 

Both Seokmin and Jisoo jolted in surprise only to see Jihoon leaning his body on the door frame for support, face flush red. They didn’t realize he was there all along listening to them.

 

“What’s the point of writing a song when there’s no one who’s going to listen to it?” Jihoon started. “When there’s no one giving you a smile as bright as the sun after hearing what you made? When there’s no one telling you how they love your song— when there’s no one who’s going to sing what you wrote? What’s the point of making a song when—“ Jihoon bit his lower lip, tears started to fall down from his eyes and Jisoo and Seokmin can only watch as he walks towards his cousin. He kneeled down in front of Jisoo as he tries to be as coherent as possible as he speaks while sobbing. “When—when there’s no one who’s going to tell you they love you. Tell me, hyung. Tell me. Please.”

 

To say that Jihoon was a sobbing mess was an understatement. It was the first time Seokmin had seen him that weak. Jihoon has this strong demeanor where he screams _I might be small but if you mess with me I’ll end you._ Seokmin can feel the pain Jihoon is feeling at that moment though he knows Jihoon’s pain is worse.

 

Excusing himself, Seokmin gave Jisoo and Jihoon some space and decided to sleep in the living room instead. When he closed the door of their room, that’s when he realized that another song was playing from Jihoon’s phone. Jihoon can actually be a singer. He has a great voice and can arrange his song according to his vocal range.

 

Seokmin was preparing himself to sleep when he realized that Jihoon’s music is still on. He was about to turn it off when the lyrics finally sunk to him.

 

_“Now goodbye._

_Will it stop now?_

_These raindrops, these tears?_

_I don’t want to get wet with the rain_

_And tremble with cold_

_Someday, the cold rain_

_Will become warm tears and fall down_

_It’s alright._

_It’s just a passing downpour.”_

After that day, everything changed. Jihoon is not uptight as how he was before and started to joke around with Jisoo and Seokmin. The younger didn’t know what changed. Maybe Jisoo and Jihoon had _the talk_ and it just made Jihoon change. Though no one mentioned what happened on the 22nd of November. It was like an unspoken rule in between the three of them.

 

When Seokmin announced that his company is already planning for his solo debut, they celebrated. But he also said that it meant, he’s also moving out. It was sad—he was used on having both of his hyungs taking care of him. But Jihoon and Jisoo let him feel how proud they were for him.

 

Before Seokmin left, Jihoon let him listen to the songs he made for Soonyoung. “Listen to them before I’m going to delete them.”

 

Seokmin knows Jihoon doesn’t have the heart to do that. He proved it when Jihoon gave him _“Downpour”_ when he asked Jihoon to write him a song. Seokmin knows how harsh he was when he asked Jihoon to write him a song. It was actually Jisoo’s idea but he didn’t say that to Jihoon. _Downpour_ was the last song Jihoon had ever written for his lover whose name he eventually knew as Soonyoung (though Jihoon didn’t let him see a picture of _the guy_ ). He wrote it for their 6th anniversary but Soonyoung still didn’t come back. There was a day when he was still living with Jihoon and Jisoo, the two older guys went home for vacation and Seokmin was left in their shared apartment. He saw Jihoon’s drafts of lyrics while cleaning up. A few? Nope. There were a lot. He must had have been writing again but he was still trapped in the past.

 

 

\--

 

 

 

“Are you sure you’re letting this go?” Seokmin asked Jihoon when the younger gave him the demo of _Downpour._

 

 

Jihoon took a deep breath, sadness filling his eyes yet he managed to smile. “It’s— it’s for me to start anew.”

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!   
> I know-- i updated again. I just have to post this before I can continue to the present scene.   
> There will be a bit of changes in the prologue and Chapter 1--
> 
> like what i said in my previous notes, my initial plot changed. so please forgive me for the wrong timestamps and confusion in some parts-- like the years i've used. i have yet to edit the prologue properly. I was even surprised with myself that I made Joshua as Jihoon's cousin because that was not even in the plan-- I didn't have any plan yet for Joshua in the fic but then there he is-- a special appearance. lol
> 
> feel free to ask me any questions. <3
> 
> hmu @ [@igotminghaoed](https://www.twitter.com/igotminghaoed) in twitter <3
> 
> P.S.:  
> Seoksoo if you squint really hard. lol
> 
> P.P.S:
> 
> SVT IS SO HANDSOME IN THEIR TEASERS ICB


	5. The Dreams

Jihoon immediately opened the door to the control room when he heard Seokmin’s voice from the outside. He doesn’t want the younger to see him like this; weak and vulnerable but Jisoo is not here to take care of him. Worry is etched on Seokmin’s face when he entered the room and without a word, Seokmin wraps his arms around the older one. “What happened?” Seokmin asked him in a soft voice. “Seungcheol-hyung called me-- he was worried too. It’s not everyday that you ask him for something. And you made Hoshi and the--”

 

“It’s Soonyoung.” Jihoon interrupted him and Seokmin leaned his body away from Jihoon to look at him, confused,

 

“Uh-- what?”

 

“Hoshi is Soonyoung, Seokmin-ah.” Jihoon swallowed the lump in his throat. Jihoon can see the hesitation on Seokmin's voice. Guessing what the younger is going to say, so he continued. “I-- I was surprised myself. And I’m sure I was not hallucinating. It’s been years but it’s hard to forget his face especially when I still have dreams about him. Even his voice didn’t change one bit-- god Seokmin. I thought at first It was another dream but no it was real.”

 

“Perhaps--” Seokmin started, frown forming on his forehead. He never had an idea who Soonyoung was. Jihoon didn’t let him see his photos quote unquote, _“I left them all at home.”_  He didn’t dare to ask more about it because instead of a reply, he received glares instead. But then he remembered someone was standing outside the recording room earlier, looking lost and all. It was the first time he saw the man too after years of being inside that building. It could probably be Soonyoung but…

 

“Perhaps what?”

 

“No, it’s nothing.” Seokmin wanted to tell about the guy he saw outside. But at the same time he doesn’t want to give false hope to Jihoon if that man is really Soonyoung.  “Do you want to go home now? I’ll call Seunghceol-hyung and tell him that you’re not feeling well.”

 

“I really do feel like going home right now. My head hurts from crying.” Jihoon scrunches his nose up, wiping away the tears that he didn’t know were still falling. He was unconsciously crying. How funny is that even? Jihoon never thought Soonyoung will still have this strong effect on him. And the funniest thing is the fact that after he gave Seokmin _Downpour_ he lived with the thought that Soonyoung never once existed.

 

But his heart, and mind never did forget about him.

 

Jihoon slept throughout the day, ignoring Seungcheol’s calls though he called him back when he finally woke up. He got nagged at because Seungcheol’s father-mode was on. He got worried when Jihoon didn’t answer his calls but thankfully Seokmin assured him that he was already home and was taking a rest. The call ended with Jihoon telling Seungcheol that he’ll meet Hoshi in five days.

 

 _“You just don’t want to talk that’s why you’re ending this call.”_ Jihoon can hear Seungcheol pouting in the other line.

 

“I’m just really tired hyung. And my neighbor just moved in and they are too loud so I just want to sleep.”

  


_“Okay you little baby. It’s still four in the afternoon but yes, go sleep.”_

 

They bid their goodbye and Jihoon plugged in his earphones in his phone to block out the noise his new neighbour is making.

  


* * *

 

Soonyoung went to Seungcheol’s office to meet Jeonghan there. He somehow felt quite defeated, sitting their in one of the chairs, fiddling with his fingers while Jeonghan is busy talking to Seungcheol. He scoffs when he heard his cousin laugh weirdly because yes, Jeonghan is definitely flirting with the CEO. _Why do I think I am being used here?_ Soonyoung thought to himself but then he was called  by Jeonghan to come over.

 

“I’m really sorry for what happened. Woozi told me he was not feeling well and is hoping for a rescheduled meeting soon. Jeonghan already briefed me when your debut is ” Seungcheol said once Soonyoung is settled on the seat across him. “The demo is actually currently in process right now. But Woozi needs to know your vocal range first before he can finish it. I’ll inform Jeonghan when the next meeting will be.”

 

“It’s really alright, you don’t have to worry about it!” Soonyoung replied rather enthusiastically. “I’m thankful that you’ve given me an opportunity to let Woozi produce my album despite the fact that I’m just a rookie and is about to debut.”

 

Seungcheol left out a soft chuckle then holds out his hand to Soonyoung for a handshake and the latter didn’t think twice to reply the gesture. “Well, it’s a great opportunity to work with you. Jeonghan left you under my care since it’s not everyday that he will be here to look after you. So if there’s any problem with Woozi, don’t hesitate to talk it to me. That brat is sometimes moody after all” Seungcheol said the last line with a snort it made Soonyoung wonder if Seuncheol and Woozi are friends outside the company. “I’ll call Jeonghan once the date of the next meeting is settled, alright?”

 

Soonyoung and Jeonghan left the company to go back to their own after Jeonghan and Seunghceol had their _private talk_ that requires for Soonyoung to leave them for privacy. He didn’t question Jeonghan when they were in the car but he was really curious about it. When he took a glance before leaving the room, the two were already in a hushed, heated discussion. It’s like there’s something more between the two CEOs that he didn’t know about.

 

Two days had passed since then and Woozi’s song got another _Daesang_ from an award show. Soonyoung’s admiration towards the latter grew, and the pressure to do better on the songs Woozi is going to give him is high. Daesang is hard to achieve not when he’s just new; _Rookie of the Year_ is his goal. Seungcheol had called Jeonghan that day and he’s set to meet Woozi once again in three days.

 

Soonyoung didn’t slack. He kept on practicing, and practicing, and practicing it made Jeonghan and his friends almost worried. _Almost._ Then they realized, it’s _almost that time of the year._

 

Two years ago, on the 22nd day of November, his heart felt like breaking in pieces and he cried nonstop. The following year, it happened again on the same day. And the night of the 21st, whenever he goes to sleep, he would always dream about the same scene over and over again. In his dream, Soonyoung was hugging someone shorter than him while saying his goodbye with a wide smile. It was a boy. He couldn’t see the face though since only the back of the other’s head was shown. Soonyoung then hesitantly walked away while carrying his bag and as he turned around, the boy was waving at him. A car honked somewhere which made Soonyoung run towards the boy, engulfing the latter into a tight hug. Soonyoung looked at him with a lot of adoration before leaning in to press a gentle kiss on the boy’s forehead. The dream always end there and it felt so real he cried everytime he woke up. Whenever he try to remember the boy’s face, he couldn’t. He spoke to Jeonghan about it and the older told him that sometimes he is like that too.  Sad for no reason; the kind where you cry without knowing why.

 

His friends told him to try hypnosis because it must be a fragment of his memory but he refused. He tried it once before and it’s for him to remember his part memories but when he did, the pain was unbearable the therapist stopped him to go in too deep and it ended up for him to forget the new memories he just made.

 

And that day has come once again. It was like a routine. He dreamt about it again but this time when the previous scene faded away he didn’t wake up but instead a new scene appeared. He was walking with the boy, holding each other’s hand. He heard his name being called in a faint voice, then his hand was tugged towards the boy and the latter tiptoed to lean in and kiss Soonyoung on the lips. That’s when he woke up and Soonyoung was not in tears but rather, he was flustered. He bit his lower lip, trying to feel if the kiss was real but how stupid of him-- he is alone at home. How can someone even kiss him. He was happy that he didn’t cry because he’s smiling. His happiness was cut short because he is crying and that stabbing pain is there once again.

 

When Soonyoung arrived in their company and he dedicated himself in dancing, dancing, and dancing. He danced his heart out to get away with the pain and he is thankful that his friends and Jeonghan didn’t pry too much about what he was feeling today.

  


His day unexpectedly ended smoothly save from his little frowns and sad smiles.

  
  
  
  


And the small (adorable) man currently sleeping in front of his door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I finally updated orz
> 
> Work had been occupying my time these past few weeks and I was tired every time I arrive home so my brain wouldn't work orz I know-- It's a cliffhanger but who could the guy sleeping on Soonyoung's door be???????  
> Also, I wanted to update today too because I'm sure I couldn't tomorrow and the day after tomorrow. It's Wanna One's last concert after all. Since Thursday, I had been crying because it just hurt a lot. Especially when I see the members cry TT
> 
> Though SVT in Idol Room didn't fail to make me laugh xD They're just so hilarious XD
> 
> Don't forget to stream [HOME](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R9VDPMk5ls0)!!!!!!! 6M Views and we will be given a special video from them<3
> 
> hmu [@igotminghaoed](https://www.twitter.com/igotminghaoed) in twitter if you'd like to talk to me~ <3
> 
>  
> 
> P.S:
> 
> I'm posting this while listening to Seungkwan's surprise VLive xD SoonHoon was therrrreeee. and i was graced by Seungkwan and Seokmin's beautiful singing voices <3


	6. The Drunk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jihoon woke up to a stranger's house.

Soonyoung looked around to see if he’s at the right floor. He squinted his eyes on the number placed on the door to check if he is really right outside his flat. He just moved in days ago and it is possible to get lost but as he read the numbers, Soonyoung is sure that yes, he is indeed outside his apartment. So, the next question is, who is the guy leaning on his door? 

 

Soonyoung squatted down to look clearly on the guy and he doesn’t know why but he looks somewhat familiar, his head started to hurt just by thinking on where he had seen him. He had no time to think about it though because the other man is already shivering from the cold. “Hey,” Soonyoung poked his finger on the man’s somewhat fluffy cheek, an attempt to wake him up. “Excuse me.” He tried once again, now lightly shaking the man’s shoulder. The latter only grunted in response but no sign of waking up. 

 

Soonyoung has no choice.

 

Like a kind man he is, Soonyoung did his best to carry the man in a piggyback ride (he’s thankful that he is light, and Soonyoung thought that he is really wasted for not waking up), keying in his password and brings the man inside his house. Soonyoung doesn’t really need to point it out yet, he couldn’t help but note that the drunk guy smells good despite of the alcohol mixing his scent. Soonyoung softly placed him on his bed before turning on the aircon. 

 

Soonyoung went to his closet and picked a pair of his pajamas but before he can pull out a pair, he wondered why is he actually doing this. He can just let the guy sleep in discomfort called his clothes than lending him something comfortable to wear. He looked back at the small man and he can feel something tugging inside him but he brushes it off.  _ It’s the sheets. It’s the sheets—I don’t like seeing someone lying on my bed without changing their clothes. Yes, that’s it. _ Soonyoung convinced himself while walking back to his bed. Sitting on the space beside the man, Soonyoung holds the hem of his shirt and takes it off carefully, managing to not wake up the stranger. When he was about to put on the pajama he brought, he felt fingers tracing his cheek and he froze.

 

Soonyoung watched as those once closed eyes fluttered open and he is not joking when he says they’re one of the most beautiful eyes he had ever seen. The stranger was looking at Soonyoung blankly, and he started to caress Soonyoung’s cheek with his fingers and weirdly, Soonyoung leaned in to the touch like a magnet. The stranger was staring up at him, his finger now moving to trace Soonyoung’s eyes, his nose, and Soonyoung’s breath hitched when the latter’s thumb traced the contour of his lips. 

 

Soonyoung didn’t pull away. He doesn’t know why but it seems wrong to do so.

 

Then suddenly, a lone tear fell from the stranger’s eyes and Soonyoung watched him smiling bitterly. “Is this a dream?” The stranger asked in a hoarse voice but Soonyoung only stared back at the latter in reply. He was speechless. Soonyoung is sure he had heard that voice somewhere but he doesn’t know where. “Maybe it is, right? There’s no way—” 

 

Soonyoung was about to respond but the words suddenly died in his throat when the stranger continued to speak.

 

“You didn’t change one bit, Soonyoung.” 

  
  


* * *

Jihoon woke up feeling his head heavy and splitting in two. “Fuck—how much did I even drink last night?” He slowly opened his eyes, and he doesn’t know if he is still drunk because why is his daffodil ceiling now white? When he looked to his side he realized he’s not in his room—he’s in someone else’s home.

 

It was his birthday yesterday and Seokmin decided to drink all the stress away and so they did. To protect Seokmin’s name, they agreed to just drink at Jihoon’s apartment, of course with permission from Seungcheol. Jihoon was about to go out to buy drinks and food to pair with when a loud knock came from his door. Surprised is an understatement when he saw his cousin who was Los Angeles days ago outside his door bringing a box of beer and bottles of soju. Seokmin came in later with food in hand.

 

Jihoon told Jisoo about what happened recently which is, the appearance of no other than Kwon Soonyoung. Jihoon is thankful that Jisoo listened to him well as he pours his feelings out. He didn’t cry though. He did his best not to even though it was pretty much obvious how his eyes got watery just from remembering seeing Soonyoung in person after how many years.

 

“I don’t know how to face him, hyung.” Jihoon confessed with a heavy sigh.

 

“You won’t, right? You’re hidden.” Jisoo replied.

 

“That’s what hurt the most. He won’t know it’s me. I’m going to be the one who’s going to suffer all over again.”

 

Jihoon had no idea how many cans of beer had he drank, and Seokmin had the nerve to make Soju Bomb. Jisoo, the soberer one out of three told Jihoon he’ll just be sleeping in Seokmin’s place since he’s going to drive the younger home anyways. Even though he’s drunk as fuck, he managed to send Jisoo carrying a very drunk Seokmin (whose face is pretty much covered so that he won’t be seen) on his back to the elevator. And the last thing he remembered is him keying in his passcode but his door won’t open so he says, “Fuck it. I’ll just sleep here,” and so he did.

 

Palming the side of his head as he sits up, Jihoon thought he must have fallen asleep on someone else’s door. However, it alarmed him when he realized he’s not wearing the clothes he was wearing last night. But the note on the bedside table shakes off his worry.

 

_ “You slept outside my door and I don’t know where you live so I brought you inside. About you in my pyjamas, don’t worry—nothing happened last night. I just don’t like it when someone sleeps on my bed without changing their clothes. :)” _

 

He noticed that beside that note, there’s another note beside a pill and a glass of water which says: 

 

_ “For your hangover :)”  _

 

Jihoon doesn’t know any of his neigbour since he doesn’t really like engaging with people that much. His neighbours might also haven’t seen him or even know him. But this neighbour of his is obviously caring and kind. Jihoon can be anything but good, he can be a thief, a murderer yet his neighbour let him in and not freeze himself to death. Before Jihoon can take the pill, Jihoon had to run to the bathroom to puke his guts out.  _ I swear I’ll never drink again.  _

 

Once he was done cleaning himself up (thanking his neighbour for having a mouthwash stored in his bathroom) and drinking the medicine for his hangover, Jihoon walked out of the bedroom to look for the owner of the house. He just realized he haven’t seen the latter, or heard someone outside the bedroom. The things scattered around gives away that the person living is a man. He also noticed the boxes piled inside the bedroom, some in the living room and it looks like he just moved in. Realization dawned him that  _ maybe _ the person he is calling neighbour is literally his neighbour.

 

Jihoon saw the crumpled blanket on the couch and he felt sorry for taking his neighbour’s bed. He took the blanket and folded it before contemplating whether he’ll wait for his neighbour or he’ll go to his apartment,change clothes then wait in the hallways until his neighbour arrives to thank him. He chose the latter. 

 

Halfway on going back to the bedroom to pick up his clothes, he heard the door opening,there’s  a shuffle of paper bags and plastics, and Jihoon froze on his spot with his back to his neighbour. 

 

“Oh! You’re up.” 

 

If Jihoon was frozen earlier, he feels like he is stuck inside an iceberg when he heard that overly familiar voice. His heart started to pump harder than ever before, his head hurting more, and his stomach is starting to churn. 

 

Noticing that the small man is stoned on his place, Soonyoung placed the bags he is holding on the counter before walking towards his neighbour is while asking, “Hey, are you okay? Are you still feeling unwell?”

 

Soonyoung stood right in front of Jihoon, bending his knees to adjust his height so that he can look at his neighbour’s face and then they locked eyes. The weather is cold, yet Jihoon sweats a lot just by standing there while looking at the same pair of eyes he had looked at countless of times before. Jihoon didn’t get to properly see what changed at Soonyoung days ago in the recording studio but now, now that Soonyoung is only inches away from him he can say that nothing really had change- except for the fact that he got even more handsome from the last time he saw him. He wanted to cry, Jihoon really does. Instead, he balled his fist, to stop himself from doing so. He wanted to ask a lot of questions like,  _ Why? Why did you leave me? Why didn’t you come back? _

 

Before he can say anything else, Jihoon broke the eye contact and ran for his life to once again empty his stomach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love cliffhangers as much as I hate them. Lol i finally updated! 
> 
>  
> 
> Congratulations to SVT's Home 3rd win! And have you played SSPledis? It's actually really fun. Lol i had played SSSMTown before so it's nothing new though Pledis' raps insanely i had a hard time in hard level orz and svt's songs are hard .w. 
> 
>  
> 
> On the side note i am happy now at what wanna one members are doing after the disbandment. They have their solo fan meeting, solo albums, acring career, soon to be in a boy group and minhyun is back in nu'est!!! 
> 
> Please do share what you think of this chapter~ and my twi is open for any suggestion: [@igotminghaoed](https://www.twitter.com/igotminghaoed)
> 
> I'll open a cc soon!
> 
> Don't forget to stream Home! 
> 
>  
> 
> Kudos and comments are highly appreciated!


	7. Chapter 5: The Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unbeta-ed

Jihoon once again gargled his mouth after he was able to let out the little contents that is left in his stomach. He was sure he already let it all out earlier. Turning on the faucet and wetting his face with water, Jihoon looked at himself in the mirror and sees his eyes red from crying (he cried because he puked his guts out), and his hands started to tremble unconsciously. He doesn’t know if him vomiting whatever is left from last night’s drinking party is because he is still in the hangover phase or because of the anxiety that built up when Soonyoung looked at him straight to his eyes. 

 

A knock on the bathroom’s door halted Jihoon’s train of thoughts then it was followed by a soft voice which belongs to the man (of his problems) in his mind right now. “Uh…” There was a pregnant pause from the latter and Jihoon knocked the door once in response. “If you’re feeling better already and is done cleaning up—I prepared breakfast for both us so please eat before you leave. I’m pretty sure you’re hungry right now.”

 

Jihoon didn’t respond verbally but he knocked the door once again. He then heard a shuffling sound outside the door and the sound of footsteps slowly disappearing. Questions started to arise the more Jihoon is staring at his reflection. Why is Soonyoung acting like nothing happened? Why is it easy for him to look at Jihoon earlier as if he did nothing? Why is he being casual about this?

 

Few minutes after he collected his thoughts and memorized the lines—more like accusations—he is going to say to Soonyoung, Jihoon finally went out of the bathroom and walks straight to the dining area where Soonyoung is probably. 

 

Soonyoung is indeed there and Jihoon observes him quietly as the latter didn’t seem to notice his presence. Soonyoung is arranging the already arranged chopsticks beside the bowl of rice that he prepared. There is a bowl of fried chicken and some side dishes in the table and first look at it, it seems like he cooked it but then, the plastics of take outs gave the truth away. Jihoon cleared his throat to get the latter’s attention and Soonyoung looked up and saw him awkwardly standing in Soonyoung’s pajamas. Soonyoung couldn’t help but chuckle lightly at the sight. 

 

“Hi. Well, uhm.” Soonyoung pulled out the chair in front of him while looking at Jihoon. “Please do sit.”

 

Jihoon scrunched his nose up before doing what he was told, sitting at the chair Soonyoung offered him. He watches as Soonyoung rounds the table with a grin and sits across him. He was about to speak up when Jihoon beats him up to it and the next words Jihoon heard got him confused.

 

“I’m Soonyoung, by the way. Kwon Soonyoung.”

 

Jihoon looked at the extended hand in front of him, blinking at it before travelling his eyes up at the man across him while Jihoon clutches his hand. Why would Soonyoung even introduce himself to him with that innocent and excited look. What is really going on? He looked at Soonyoung’s eyes and there, he saw no recognition from the latter’s face. Should Jihoon feel dread from that realization? If this is the Soonyoung whom he knew, he wouldn’t be like this just speaking casually. The Soonyoung he knows will talk nonstop, apologies spilling from his lips and he’ll explain himself why he didn’t come back to him. Just like that one time when he wasn’t able to go to their musical practice that Jihoon arranged because he slept in, Soonyoung flooded him with messages and spoiled him the following days. He wouldn’t be this kind of Soonyoung in front of him who introduces himself like it’s the first time they met… or is it?

 

“Oh uh…” Soonyoung takes back his hand and hid it under the table as the atmosphere seems to tense up. The silence enveloping them became heavy and the man in front of him is just staring at him speechless and Soonyoung doesn’t know how to deal with that except to keep the conversation going despite not getting any response from the latter. “I just moved in days ago. I’m sorry if everything’s a mess. I haven’t properly arranged my things yet. Are you also around here? You can eat already by the way.”

 

Still with no response, Soonyoung scrunches his nose up and he heaves out a sigh. Giving up is not in his dictionary but he guessed he can slip it in once or twice especially when the latter doesn’t want to talk to him. Soonyoung thanked for the food and took his chopsticks, getting a piece of chicken and puts it on top of his bowl of rice.

 

“Lee Jihoon.” Soonyoung was about to take a bite when he finally heard his visitor spoke and did he just tell him his name? Soonyoung looked up from his bowl and looked at  _ Jihoon _ , dropping the chicken once again on his rice. “Does that ring a bell?” The latter continued.

 

“Uh—sorry. No?” Soonyoung replied, and he saw Jihoon’s left eye twitch from his reply. He also saw how Jihoon tries his best to mask his expression with his poker face but Soonyoung somehow can read him easily. “Should that name ring somewhere?” Jihoon is sad.  

 

Without any word, Jihoon proceeded to eat the food that was prepared for him without looking at Soonyoung. He managed to but he doesn’t know if h was able to hide the soft sniffs he is making because what the fuck is this he is going to cry once again. A man with the same face as  _ his _ Soonyoung, same voice with  _ his _ Soonyoung, same quirks with  _ his  _ Soonyoung, and has the same smile with  _ his _ Soonyoung is in front of him but he is different. Different in a way that he doesn’t look at Jihoon with hearts pouring down his eyes. He doesn’t look at Jihoon like he is the only one that matters; like he is  _ Soonyoung’s world. _ But rather, the Soonyoung there with him looks at him with patience and confusion, trying to understand Jihoon. He wanted to ask,  _ can’t you remember me? Don’t you know me? Did you really forget about me? _ But Jihoon doesn’t have the courage to hear Soonyoung’s answers.

 

Jihoon wondered if he jinxed what he said to his cousin last night, “ _ That’s what hurt the most. He won’t know it’s me. I’ll be the one who’s going to suffer all over again.”  _

 

He is already suffering. The more he thinks about it, the more he loses his appetite. He didn’t look at Soonyoung and see what face is he making but when he did, they made eye contact and Jihoon was quick to look away. Not finishing his breakfast, Jihoon closed his chopsticks together and stood up from his seat and speaks, still not looking at Soonyoung. “Thanks for the food and thank you for taking care of me last night,” He bowed his head in thanks and proceeded himself to the door but before he can even reach it, he felt fingers gripping his wrist and those familiar hand made his skin tingle. 

 

“Wait—” Jihoon looked at the hand that is holding him then to Soonyoung whose eyes are burning with something Jihoon can’t pinpoint out. “Is that name… something I should have remembered? You seemed to know me, Lee Jihoon.” 

 

The way Jihoon’s name roll on Soonyoung’s tongue could almost make Jihoon burst in tears. Oh, how he missed it and Jihoon hates himself for still feeling this way. Is it bad to think that he wants to move his hand and slip his fingers in between Soonyoung’s?

 

“No—” Jihoon reluctantly removed his hands from Soonyoung’s grip, giving the latter a soft smile. “I just thought—you know me is all. I’m your neighbor after all,” and with that, Jihoon walked out of his door.

 

Ruffling his hair, Soonyoung walked back to the dining area and eyes the table—Jihoon barely ate his meal. Sighing, Soonyoung takes Jihoon’s bowl as he takes a seat and eats it instead. When Jihoon left his apartment, Soonyoung knows everything the latter said was bullshit. Ever since he heard his name being spoken to by someone whom he never met, and whom he knows nothing about last night saying he hadn’t changed, Soonyoung perceived by then that Jihoon is one of the keys to his memories in the past. It also didn’t slip his mind that Jihoon might have been someone special to him before.  It was pure worry when he ran to Jihoon when the latter was frozen in his spot when Soonyoung arrived. He was also worried when Jihoon took too long in the bathroom that he thought Jihoon might have fainted. He was sad when Jihoon was sad earlier during breakfast and before Jihoon left, he somehow wanted to see Jihoon smile from ear to ear rather than seeing him smile that doesn’t reach his eyes. 

 

Soonyoung wanted to tell Jihoon about him losing his memories and since he seems to know him, he might be of help on remembering his past but Soonyoung guessed it’s not time yet. He always believes in perfect timing. But he bets, Jihoon already got the gist of it.  Little did Soonyoung know, Jihoon was already breaking down outside his door.

 

Jihoon’s legs gave out once he stepped out of Soonyoung’s home. His heart was beating erratically earlier when Soonyoung held his wrist and he felt like he was being suffocated because of the lump formed in his throat. The first drop of his tears fell down from his eyes and the only thing he can think about is how pathetic he is. He broke into quiet sobs, crouching on the floor like a child who doesn’t know what to do. Gaining his strength to stand up after crying for a short while, Jihoon looked at the doors of his and Soonyoung’s which are adjacent with each other. 

 

Jihoon keyed in his passcode and entered his own home while thinking, why must  _ fate _ play with him? Jihoon didn’t make it to his room when he cries nonstop because he doesn’t know how to stop his tears though he managed to walk towards his couch and sits on it. During those times when Jihoon thinks he had let go of Soonyoung already, accepting the fact that he won’t be coming back anymore, the latter came marching in to his life once again. When Jihoon thinks he can deal with Soonyoung’s presence, and may or may not have a spark of hope that everything will be okay. He may not be able to forgive Soonyoung that easily but Soonyoung was also his best friend even before they became lovers. However, truth slapped him and he knew that Soonyoung didn’t even recognize him. Soonyoung might not even remember a thing about him. 

 

Jihoon wanted to press on Soonyoung earlier about Soonyoung not recognizing him. But something is stopping Jihoon from doing so. He wanted to know what happened. He wanted to know why Soonyoung couldn’t remember Jihoon. He wanted to know if there’s a small feeling of familiarity while both of them are sitting accross each other but Jihoon couldn’t even muster a word when Soonyoung asked if he should have heard his name. Jihoon felt like a big rock was dropped on his head followed by an ice-cold water being poured all over him when he heard it. It confirmed his allegations from the start. 

 

After years of being together, it was impossible for Soonyoung not to recognize Jihoon’s voice the first time they met. Soonyoung knows how Jihoon doesn’t like sleeping in pajamas since he feels hot wearing it so he mostly sleep in his shirt and boxers, and Soonyoung will knock nonstop on the bathroom door until Jihoon will open the door for him. 

 

Jihoon hates it whenever he cry. He feels weak. But he let himself be that morning. He lost Soonyoung once and now that Soonyoung came back, he realized, he might lose him again, forever. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Early update!
> 
> I've been trying to finish this since earlier and i'm glad i was able to. 
> 
> This is my first 2k chapter and i realized the word count increases every update lol I might start making longer chapters since i'm aiming for a short-chaptered fic which won't feel like it was rushed orz 
> 
> I have a pending Verkwan fic that was supposed to be posted on Seungkwan's birthday but i failed so i might continue it once this fic ends. <3
> 
> Congratulations SVT for their 6th win today <3 
> 
> Don't forget to stream Home! And don't hesitate to talk to me in twitter: [ @igotminghaoed ](https://www.twitter.com/igotminghaoed)
> 
> Kudos and comments are appreciated!


	8. Chapter 6: The Song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Woozi finally wrote the perfect song for Hoshi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 100 kudos! Thank you so much <3

Jihoon woke up with less headache than what he had in the morning. However, he is sure that his eyes are currently sore from the crying that he did before he fell asleep. Looking at the digital clock hanging on his wall, he checked the time and it’s already nearly four in the afternoon. Suddenly, the memories from earlier came back to him once again and Jihoon can only sigh at that. Why is this happening to him once again? True that even though he claimed before that he had moved on but he had this tiny bit of hope that he will be able to see Soonyoung once again. Soonyoung being dead didn’t slip his mind but his heart tells him that he is still alive and has nothing to worry. Well, yes, Soonyoung is alive. He is still Soonyoung—minus the memories, that is. Heaving another deep sigh, Jihoon got off the couch and went straight to the bathroom to clean himself up and when he sees himself in the mirror he swore over his music he’s never going to drink again.

 

After taking a warm bath, Jihoon puts on something more comfortable then dries his hair with a towel. That’s when he realized that he hasn’t checked his phone since he got home earlier. Jihoon found his phone on the messy coffee table in his living room along with the cans of beers and the leftover food from last night. When he unlocks his phone, he was flooded by Seokmin complaining how a bummer his hangover is and luckily, his schedule is in the evening. There’s one from Jisoo asking him if he’s alright since he was totally wasted and he wants to come over but he promised a friend that they will meet each other so, he might drop by later after their meeting. And the last text is from Seungcheol reminding him about his meeting with Hoshi tomorrow. Soonyoung, a.k.a, Hoshi, his next-door neighbor, a gentle reminder that he has a pending work to do. He doesn’t know how many times he did it today, but with another sigh (he’s definitely feeling lazy today, blame the hangover) Jihoon replied everything in his inbox. 

 

Lying on his bed thinking of what he’s going to do, Jihoon’s stomach growled in hunger. He just then realized that the last time he ate was the breakfast Soonyoung had prepared for him. He was about to reach out for his phone to call for a delivery when something hits him (not literally).  _ Soonyoung. Soonyoung. Soonyoung. _

 

With that, Jihoon climbed off his bed and strides towards his working area, opening his laptop and readies the necessities to make his music. For days after he met Soonyoung, Jihoon didn’t have the energy to touch his laptop which stressed out Seungcheol but the latter knows not to pressure Jihoon about it. Jihoon felt sorry towards Seungcheol though since the older doesn’t know what was happening to him. But during those times, Jihoon was still in the state of shock and bafflement because of Soonyoung’s sudden appearance. But now, now that he knew Soonyoung doesn’t even remember him, it gave Jihoon a spark of inspiration to make a song. Jihoon heard Soonyoung sing a million times before so he is very much familiar with Soonyoung’s vocal range moreover, one thing that Jihoon wanted to see is Soonyoung’s dance. Without doubt, he has improved; he is going to debut after all.

 

The curiosity about Soonyoung is there. The thought of asking Soonyoung what happened lingers in the back of his mind but Jihoon had watched enough dramas with the protagonists having an amnesia to know not to pry too much or to shock them with questions and information—or he can ask questions to his cousin since Jisoo is a psychologist. Okay, maybe asking his cousin on how to deal with Soonyoung is actually a good idea. He’ll keep that in mind. The song that he had prepared first for  _ Hoshi _ was long forgotten but rather, he makes a new one.

 

For Soonyoung.

 

Jihoon is focusing too much in his work that he didn’t know how much time had passed and he even forgot that he was hungry earlier.  The sound of his doorbell broke his momentum and that’s when he felt his stomach looking for food. He really should have called for a delivery before he started working. When he checked the monitor, he saw no one outside of his door. Curious, he opened his door only to find a paper bag hanging on its knob. Taking the paper bag in, there’s a sticky note on it that says:

 

_ “I left your clothes here earlier when I went out. But when I came back, it’s still here. I added dinner just in case you haven’t eaten anything yet! A gift from your new neighbor.  _ _ 😊 _ _ ” _

_ -Soonyoung  _

So… why is he crying once again? Damn you, Kwon Soonyoung.

 

Jihoon has decided.

 

He’s giving Soonyoung  _ that one _ song. 

  
  
  
  


“Uh… Are you alright, hyung?” Seokmin asked Jihoon the following day when they met in the company’s recording studio exclusive for Jihoon only. Jihoon probably doesn’t look like the usual Lee Jihoon. His hair is messy (he didn’t get to take a bath—he was almost late!), his eyes are sore plus the bags underneath it (he admits he cried once again), and he was wearing a not so Jihoon-style. Seungcheol threw him a worried look when he reported in the latter’s office earlier that morning, but he knows he can’t get this rescheduled especially since he hasn’t told Seungcheol what was the reason why he made Soonyoung leave the first time the latter showed up. Seungcheol also didn’t pry about it and Jihoon assured him that he is okay and all schedules will push through accordingly.

 

“I’m alright. I just didn’t get enough sleep while watching a drama and finishing this song.” Jihoon yawns while rubbing his eyes, taking out his flash drive to attach it on his computer and opens the song he made. Seokmin knows there is more than that 

 

“ I’m always amazed on how you can easily multi-task your songwriting while doing other things.” Seokmin chuckled in the background, taking a chair to sit beside Jihoon. “And now it includes crying. Is this about the  _ Hoshi _ guy once again?” Jihoon looked like he was about to retort but Seokmin beats him up to it. “I know how it looks like when you cry buckets of tears, hyung. You can’t lie to me about it.”

 

Jihoon shut his mouth and does his work as if he didn’t hear what Seokmin said. He heard the younger sigh and after a minute of silence, a soft melody filled the room followed by Jihoon’s voice. Jihoon usually pick in one of their trainees to sing the demo for the song but since he wrote it just the night before, he had no other choice but to sing it himself. Seokmin looked at Jihoon, who has his eyes closed because he realized it is a different song from the one Jihoon made weeks ago from  _ Hoshi.  _ Did he seriously change the song in just one night? Seokmin couldn’t help but be in awe at Jihoon’s talent in song making. He writes the lyrics of the songs, compose and arrange them, and he produce then very well. Ever since before, Seokmin was always amazed on Jihoon’s talent but the older just kept on surprising him even more. Seokmin listened well to the lyrics of the song and slowly, it dawned on him.  _ Oh. Oh.  _ This song is definitely dedicated to Hoshi or the man who still has Jihoon’s heart, Kwon Soonyoung. The bridge part of the song suddenly came and Seokmin can really feel the desperation, the longing, the things Jihoon wants to convey. 

 

****_“_ _I’m alright (I’m not alright)_ __  
_I don’t miss you (I miss you so much)_ __  
_With words I don’t even mean_ _  
_ _Even if they’re lies, I need to say it_

****_My heart won’t listen like I want_ __  
_Come back, come back, come back_ _  
_ _My other half isn’t here so how can I live as one?_

**_I don’t wanna cry_ **

****_Don’t wanna cry_ __  
_Don’t wanna cry_ __  
_I have a lot of tears_ _  
_ _But I don’t wanna cry_

****_Don’t wanna cry_ __  
_When we see each other again_ _  
_ _Don’t wanna cry”_

 

 

“Let me guess.” Seokmin said when the song ended. “The title is Don’t Wanna Cry?” 

 

Jihoon laughed softly and asked the younger, “Is it that obvious?” 

 

As if on cue, the door to the recording room opened and the ever-so-bubbly Kwon Soonyoung appeared along with Seungcheol. Jihoon turned on the mics and speakers directed to the recording room. “Good morning.” Jihoon greeted and Soonyoung smiles widely as he bows down to greet Jihoon a good morning with so much enthusiasm and of course, by calling him Woozi. Jihoon smiled back and it definitely didn’t escape the eyes of Seokmin. Jihoon can still feel the ache, but it’s not as much as before. It’s pretty much tolerable and he doesn’t feel like crying anymore. Even though the person in front of him is Soonyoung, he will show him no mercy. 

 

Seunghceol gave Soonyoung some encouraging words and a tip, “Woozi can be a bit scary, sometimes.” 

 

“I heard that.” Jihoon’s voice boomed in the speakers.  Seungcheol just laughed and bid his goodbye to Soonyoung before transferring to the other room to watch over him. Seokmin was long gone bidding a hurried goodbye from Jihoon, scared that Seungcheol will nag at him for not practicing. 

 

* * *

 

To say that Soonyoung is excited is an understatement. He’s standing alone inside the not-so-spacious recording room, putting on the headphones provided for him. 

 

_ “Hoshi, can you hear me?” _ If he is a cat, Soonyoung’s ears would have perked up. Now that he is hearing Woozi’s voice clearly and closely because of the headphones he remembered that  wave of familiarity that washes over him after he heard Woozi speak from the speakers when he entered the recording roo. Where did he hear this voice again?

 

“Uh, yes. I can hear you clearly.” Soonyoung replied, shaking away his previous thoughts and instead, concentrate on his work right now. 

 

 _“There’s a seat by the wall. You can take that later once we start discussing the song. I already finished and I really hope it would be your liking.”_ How can Soonyoung not-- He’s _Woozi._ _“I also heard that you planned to choreograph your debut song, yeah?”_ Soonyoung nodded and he somehow can hear Woozi smiling when he continued speaking. _“That’s good.”_ Soonyoung smiled shyly while rubbing his nape. Did he just get a compliment from Woozi, himself? _“We’re going to start in three minutes.”_

 

On Woozi’s cue, the song started to play, filling in Soonyoung’s ears with the melody and he closes his eyes to feel the song to heart. But when he heard the voice that sings the intro, his eyes snapped opened and he stares at the lyrics that is in front of him.  _ “Who is he?”  _ Is the question he wants to ask but he can’t seem to find his voice.

 

 

**_“I loved you so much, where’d you go?_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Did you leave because you don’t like me anymore?”_ **

 

_ “No.”  _ Soonyoung wanted to say. Why? He doesn’t know. As he closes his eyes, he can feel his brain running a thousand miles per hour as it took him back to the dream he had years ago the one where he was leaving and there’s a guy bidding him goodbye. When they exchanged their goodbyes and whispered promises, when Soonyoung ran back to him to hug him and kiss him goodbye. 

 

And when Soonyoung shouted,  _ “I’ll be back. See you in two weeks!” _ He can definitely remember the smile the latter gave him but his memory is still hazy as he can’t still recognize the face that is smiling towards him. And then there’s 

 

Soonyoung’s head started to ache and he doesn’t know if the song is still playing or it has already stopped because all he can hear is a sharp noise piercing his ear. The defeaning silence was so hard to bear that he felt dizzy as holds his hand on the music stand with his eyes still closed tightly to balance himself. Woozi might have noticed his sudden action, and maybe he looks so disoriented because somehow he can hear the latter calling out his name. However, Soonyoung didn’t show any sign of response. 

 

Soonyoung can only make out the words, “Hoshi”, “Seungcheol”, “quickly” and before his knees give up its strength, strongs arms wrap around his torso to balance him. The last thing he remembered is someone calling him by his name,  _ “Soonyoung.” _

 

_ Soonyoung can see himself sitting in the backseat of a car and he can hear a woman talking in a loud voice as if she was in an argument. Sooyoung then took a pair of earphones and plugs it in his ear to shut the noise off around him. The voice singing the song he was listening to is so soothing it calms him down. He closes his eyes then suddenly he can hear a scream, he can see a harsh light coming there way followed by a  loud crash and he realized his earphones got taken off from his ears. The car he is in spins, before it stumbles down the road.  _

 

 

_ Everything around him became black.  _

 

 

Soonyoung woke up with a start, sweat forming on his forehead. He has no idea how long was he asleep because when he opened his eyes, he’s already inside his room. He tried so hard to remember what happened because as far as he can remember he was in the recording room listening the song he was going to sing  and oh-- right. He had one of those attacks and it’s because of Woozi once again. He sits up as he thinks back to the dream he just had before waking. He couldn’t exactly remember what happened in that dream as it slowly fades in his memory but he felt like everything that happened in that dream was too real. The crashing sound of vehicles, the scream, and a woman’s voice calling his name. 

 

For unknown reasons, Soonyoung started crying and his heart feels like it is being pricked by thousands of needles. It fucking hurts. He clenched his chest to ease the pain but it didn’t do anything. Soonyoung heard the door to his room opening but he just continues to sob then there’s fast steps approaching him, a clanking of metal hitting the wooden bedside table then there are arms cradling him. 

 

“Hey, hey. It’s okay.” 

 

_ Ah. Jeonghan-hyung.  _ In his cousin’s embrace, Soonyoung cried out the pain he is feeling and Jeonghan comforts him in silence until Soonyoung’s sobs died down. 

 

“Feeling better?” Jeonghan asked him and Soonyoung nodded in response. “Do you want to talk about it?” Soonyoung shook his head. Jeonghan understands and he dismissed the topic right away. 

 

Jeonghan pulled away from Soonyoung, transferring to the chair that is situated beside Soonyoung’s bed then he gave him a tray of food that pretty much looks like homemade and Soonyoung noticed that the bowls used are not his. “Did you bring this from your house?” 

 

“Uh no.” Jeonghan replied, crossing his arms and legs with a grin painted on his face. Oh, Soonyoung knows that grin. “Your cute little neighbour dropped by earlier asking if you’re okay since he saw you being carried unconscious inside. He brought the food and he was stuttering, how cute.”

 

“O-oh.” There’s no reason for Soonyoung’s cheeks to feel hot but he’s sure, Jeonghan can see the redness of them by now. His assumption was right when his cousin’s grin widen while he looks at him. To avoid him, Soonyoung eats the food he was given and damn, he can definitely marry his neighbour now. 

 

“You can propose to him if you want to.” Did Soonyoung spoke his thoughts again?

 

“We only talked once.” It was not the best reply. 

 

“Then maybe he’d say yes! Why would he even bring you food? And you only talked once? That’s something already, Soonyoung.” Jeonghan is definitely teasing him and his cheeks are flushed red. Why the heck is he blushing again? 

 

“I only helped him when he got drunk and I gave him dinner so maybe he was just doing the same thing for me.” Soonyoung shrugged his shoulders and he continues to eat while Jeonghan observes him with scritinizing eyes. 

 

While he was eating, Jeonghan filled him in with what Seungcheol had told him on what exactly happened earlier. It seemed like he fainted after hearing the song. Woozi called their company nurse to assist Seungcheol and thankfully, his pulse and breathing were stable. Seungcheol said that Soonyoung was getting in and out of consciousness especially that, he was conscious enough to deny their offer of bringing him to the hospital because he still has a recording to finish. When Seungcheol told him that it’s alright for the recording to be postponed and  needs to take a rest instead, Soonyoung almost whined but then Seungcheol said that Woozi wishes the same thing, he sighed in defeat. But he still says no to the hospital and that’s when Seungcheol called Jeonghan to ask for Soonyoung’s address. 

 

Soonyoung didn’t remember any of that.

 

When Soonyoung was done eating, Jeonghan decided to go home but not before he asked Soonyoung a hundred of times if it is okay to leave him and the latter had to assure him that he really is feeling better now. 

 

When Jeonghan left, Soonyoung washed the dishes before taking a shower and puts on clean clothes before looking at himself in the mirror. He definitely was not dressing up for his neighbour whose name is Jihoon. He’s just going to give back the bowls he used for the food he brought for him. 

 

Though Soonyoung can’t deny that maybe he is a little, tiny bit attracted to his neighbour. When he picked him up on his front door, he couldn’t help but realize how cute the latter is. But then, Jihoon is someone who knows him. Should he ask Jihoon about his past or should he wait until Jihoon will tell it himself? Or option 3, be friends with the cute neighbour then ask him later about his past. 

 

Soonyoung chooses option 3. 

 

 

* * *

 

When his doorbell rang, Jihoon immediately shoots up from his couch and runs to the door. He didn’t bother checking who’s behind his door and insted open it. It’s not that he was waiting for Soonyoung to ring his bell-- well, maybe he is. But he is just worried. He looks so pale earlier and his heart was being clenchex tightly when Soonyoung fainted and he couldn’t run to him because he need to stay hidden.

 

_ “You didn’t tell me you’re neighbours with Hoshi.” Seungcheol told him when the latter came back from securing that Hoshi was safely tucked in, inside his home. Jeonghan, Carat’s CEO was not available due to meetings and appointments and asked Seungcheol a favor to bring Hoshi home for him instead.  _

 

_ “I didn’t know.” Jihoon shrugged his shoulders, dismissing Seungcheol.  _

 

It was Jeonghan who opened the door for him and he was not that surprised to see the CEO. He might have checked on Soonyoung since he is his employee after all. Maybe him and Soonyoung has the same relationship with Seungcheol and Jihoon. They are close friends outside the employer-employee relationship in their company. But what Jihoon didn’t like when he was talking to Jeonghan earlier was the heavy stare he was receiving that he started to stutter. It was as if Jeonghan was reading him from the head to toe!

 

Okay, back to the present! Jihoon was met with a handsome man in a form of Kwon Soonyoung when he swings the door open. Soonyoung has a snile plastered on his face and Jihoon couldn’t honestly help but stare. 

 

“Hey.” Soonyoung started.

 

“Hi.” Jihoon replied. 

 

It was definitely awkward. 

 

“Oh right. Come in.” Jihoon stepped to the side to let Soonyoung in. Soonyoung welcomed himself in, walking straight to the kitchen to put the tray and the bowls on the counter and Jihoon followed him.

 

“The food was delicious, by the way. Thank you.” Soonyoung said, turning around to look at Jihoon who was fiddling with the hem of his shirt. 

 

“I didn’t get to properly thank you for taking care of me when I got drunk.” Jihoon started, stepping a bit closer to Soonyoung but not too close like he was invading Soonyoung’s personal space. “And I-- made everything awkward that morning but I hope you’ll forget about all that. I was a bit drunk?” 

 

“What was that about again?” if Jihoon didn’t see the grin on Soonyoung’s face, he would have thought that Soonyoung has a short term memory loss. He was actually going along with Jihoon’s wish.  _ He’s still the same Soonyoung.  _

 

“So uhm. Before anything else-- well like, you’re in my kitchen already, hi. I’m Lee Jihoon.” Jihoon extended towards Soonyoung, a soft smile on his lips. 

 

“Hi Jihoon. I’m Kwon Soonyoung.” Soonyoung took the latter’s hand and he smiles back before shaking it enthusiastically until all awkwardness died down and both of them laughed. 

 

Jihoon has decided. He wants to know what happened to Soonyoung. He wants to know the Soonyoung that is in front of him. And he’ll do his best to make Soonyoung remember him slowly. Hopefully, he can. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beep. Beep. 
> 
> I am back!
> 
> I'm sorry I was so busy with work these past few weeks. But to make up with all of that, here's a 3.5k update for y'all. I wanted to achieve a 4k but my brain power can only reach 3.5k orz
> 
> I have a lot of side stories planned /seoksoo and jeongcheol/ but i'll probably insert it somewhere. I haven't started them. 
> 
> This fic may take longer than what I intended. Orz. Jihoon and Soonyoung are back to zero after all but their story is definitely starting now. 
> 
> And thank you for the 100 kudos. I really appreciate it. You, readers are the reason why I'm doing my best to make this fanfic better and better. I want you to read this story like how I wanted to convey it and I hope it really reached you. :) 
> 
> Don't be shy to hmu in twitter [@igotminghaoed](https://www.twitter.com/igotminghaoed) or drop by at my cc! I'll answer any of your questions uwu 
> 
>  
> 
> And Woozi opened his instagaram!!! 
> 
> Kudos and comments are highly appreciated.  
> Til the next update hehe
> 
> Thank you for reading!
> 
> Ps: i have an ongoing poll uwu please answer: [ Who is the neko and tachi in SoonHoon? ](https://twitter.com/igotminghaoed/status/1102162559891734528?s=19)


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